Confession Time

Confession: It is really really really hard to parent a 2 year old ALONE!

I find myself taking deep breaths and putting myself in time out almost every day. I know she is just a lovable rambunctious mini-me in training, BUT my goodness...Does she have to test my patience every single minute? In her defense, she woke up crying on Tuesday night asking to go to the doctor to "fix her ear". Yea! Double ear infection. And sinus infection with a bad cough. Double yea! So my frustration comes in that I have been without MDO for 2 days this past week. AND, for some reason, medicine seems to just be liquid sugar. Emerson doesn't act sick or sleepy for the most part (except for being grumpy).

Tonight, it was a fight just to get "the pretty dress" off so we could put pajamas on. She's asleep right now still in that pretty dress. She won. Oh well.

The part that hurts is when I can't read her all 10 bedtime books that she requests. It's beyond the fight to sleep in her pretty dress...It's when I can't read to her, sing her songs, or play the match game all because the heart baby is just having a rough night. Unfortunately, his crying and just general being upset takes precedence right now. And that often interferes with whatever it is that Emerson wants to do at that moment. It would be so much easier to hand him off to another loving parent who was capable of helping with him. Or even take turns with each child. But alas, I do it alone.every.single.day.and.every.single.night. I just wish that bedtime had not become such a problem that I collapse at the end of it and forget just how well the day actually went.

And life goes on...

Memorial Day weekend is over! I know that is terrible to say, but it was beyond exhausting. And not to mention...Annoying since it seemed every single person that posted something on facebook was somewhere on the water this weekend. It was 97 degrees yesterday. But only 87 degrees in Mobile. Ugh. I am sure 87 felt pretty hot. But not as hot as 97.

Yesterday, I realized what has been bothering me so much lately. I have probably said "no", "stop that", "put that down", "leave that alone", "be careful", "don't drop that", etc. more so in the past week than all of Emerson's life. I randomly read parenting articles as I find something that interests me (i.e. I am not by any means researching these topics). A while ago (way before this was even an issue), I read an article about always saying "no" and trying to be a more positive parent. I really took it to heart. I try (I definitely haven't perfected this...at all) to use positive reinforcement and distraction rather than the constant "no". At our house, we have put up/removed anything that is either 1) dangerous, 2) breakable, or 3) something that we don't want played with, broken, or destroyed. It wasn't hard. We just removed it at various stages as Emerson discovered it. I would rather remove it rather than ALWAYS asking her to stop doing whatever I don't want her doing. Don't get me wrong...We are still teaching her what "no" means, but how do you teach that some things are okay and some things aren't (that look almost identical to a child)? "You can read and touch THIS book, but not that one." It doesn't make sense to me so how do I explain that to a 2 year old? It's so hard being away from home for a long period of time. Nothing is like home. We have definitely been struggling with touching things that we shouldn't this week. And on top of that naps are almost impossible (a small pack-n-play does not contain her plus it doesn't get very dark in her room), bedtime is torture, eating anything normal has been stressful, and her energy level is at all time high for some reason. I think we are all ready for us to go back to a more normal schedule/routine.

This week will be spent resting. And doing a few things "in town" (lol). I am actually excited for my doctor's appointment this week. Maybe I can actually get something out of it.

Plus, Emerson's birthday party is this Sunday! It won't be much, but we will have peanut-free cupcakes and lots of ice cream (it will apparently be very hot again)...plus just a few friends that we know in the Birmingham area. [If you are in the area and want to come, please let me know because we would love to have you.]

Tomorrow is finally June 1st! I have never been counting down the days more than right now!