Today = Blah

Today has been a crazy day. I went nowhere. It was supposed to storm...or at least rain...or at least sprinkle. But it did none of the above. So I stayed home like a good heart baby mommy (yes - we still go nowhere when germs might exist). I didn't even drive to Starbucks or something of the like just to leave the house. Boring.

Emerson asked to watch Tangled twice...She's becoming quite the princess movie watching little girl. I hoped this day would come, and now that it has, I didn't quite think about how she would just want to watch the same exact princess movie over and over again. It's a really cute movie so I don't mind watching it over.and.over.again. But sometimes I would like to watch something else... anything else. Well, except for Team Umizoomi... (I am not a fan of the belly screen if you couldn't tell...)

Robert is quite the man-diva. (Is that a word? I think I just made a new word! Yea, me!) He likes to wake up slowly. By slowly, I mean, he wakes up very alert and wants the world to stop so he can "adjust" (i.e. no extra sensory activity than absolutely needed). Emerson, on the other hand, wants him to have every toy available at that moment. So she immediately goes off to round up these toys and bring them to him one by one. Sweet, I know... But really? Do we need all these (and on my bed nonetheless)?

I guess its just her thing...making a mess I mean. This is Emerson's room after her nap (see pic below). I have always kept toys out of her bedroom (it helps with sleep patterns...no distractions...). But now that she is interested in books (without my prompting), she pulls them out herself when she doesn't want to sleep (during naps and complete darkness at night). I guess I shouldn't complain...But I do get tired of stacking books by height (yes, OCD self is trying to force tendencies on 2 year old child - JUST KIDDING!). [Not really on the kidding part. I seriously wouldn't mind if she was super obsessed with keeping things in order.]

Mister Robert has been one needy baby today. He is extremely needy every single day, but today, I put him down only to change his diaper. I think I also got about 20 minutes of playing on his mat too. But I still had to be playing with him so that doesn't help me much in doing anything else. But my arms got a break at least. I do feel bad for Emerson on these days. She doesn't get much mommy time when he is like this. And it makes me feel even worse when I think back to her at this age, when I would let her cry it out (just a bit) so she didn't become so dependant on me. Unfortunately, Robert is not able to cry it out...think blue baby... His O2 sats drop into the 70s when he gets upset. Not good.

These pictures are actually from yesterday (Friday)...It makes me feel better knowing that we actually did an activity versus just doing whatever to just survive like today. She made her Granddaddy a picture. It may not look like much, BUT she used markers, glue, and scissors to create this masterpiece. Gasp! I know...Granddaddy better be proud. And it better be hanging in his office. Emerson has mentioned it about 100 times today wondering if Granddaddy found his tape yet (you know...to hang her picture).

It's almost 9pm now (exciting Saturday night, right?)...And I am blogging with a baby on my lap. He's *trying* to sleep. I say that because he sleeps a lot, but at the same time, doesn't sleep enough (at least long enough and hard enough apparently). I am beyond tired. I think doing a lot of nothing like today actually made me more tired than usual. It's times like these that I look forward to sleep.

Bedtime for Emerson is approximately 7-7:30. And it is definitely the hardest part of the day. She has always been a champ when it came to going to bed or naps. But in the past few months, it has just become a disaster unless she is beyond tired to fight about it. She sleeps well (for the most part) once she finally passes out, but its hard to get her there. I wish I was able to read her endless stories, lay down with her, etc., but I just can't do it. I have an 8 month old on a feeding pump with a heart condition usually crying in the other room. And unfortunately, when it comes to these types of things, he has priority right now. I guess this is when I would be able to tag team with that other person who should be actively involved in our home life, but that isn't an option. I keep telling myself, "this too shall pass". I sure hope so! It is heartbreaking hearing her upset at night only wanting me to stay with her. I just don't have any other option. I am not sure who actually reads any of this, but maybe someone out there can send up a little prayer for me about this. It really bothers me that I can't comfort Emerson when she is upset at bedtime.

On another note...I am trying to get back to my blog. I actually have quite a few posts that are still "drafts". I never posted them...Maybe its time to get those up so you can see what we have all been doing and, most importantly, how Robert has been progressing.

Robert is 6 Weeks Old!

Robert is SIX WEEKS OLD!

If I look back at the past 6 weeks, I sometimes think that time has stood still and it has been the longest 6 weeks of my entire life. At other times, I can't believe that 6 weeks have gone by either. I don't know if its because I compare the first 6 weeks of life to my only other experience - Emerson - or if its just exhaustion.

As for what Robert is up to these days...It pretty much includes sleeping. He sleeps ALL day. He does have moments of being awake, but those are fleeting and we make a big deal about it only to look down and see him asleep again. You can't help but feel sorry for the little guy, his heart is working really hard to keep up with his tiny body. And now that he has the shunt, it will actually be more tiring for his heart to keep up (having to pump more blood as he has the ability to send more to the lungs). Robert has perfected the sleeping through a feeding...and even burping. I still have to wake him in the middle of the night to eat.

We have had issues with feeding since birth practically, so just in the past week we have switched from Enfamil Nutramigen to Similac Isomil to Similac Alimentum. If you are just dying to know the reason...It includes blood in his stool (to be polite). He also had severe reflux (spitting up at any and all times of the day out of mouth and nose...gross)...The Zantac prescription has improved that problem greatly. But the other is still a work in progress. The Similac Alimentum was just started today. We will see how that goes. On the other side, I have had to restrict my own diet to a gluten free, soy free, vegan diet. Oh, the plethora of food options...[sarcasm]. Maybe the baby weight will fall off sooner than the previous 9 months after Emerson. For anyone else suffering along with me...Check out this blog: Collins Cooking.

So...to sum it all up...He probably isn't hitting any milestones. And its pretty much due to having to lie on his back, only being picked up like a newborn infant (the scoop technique), and sleeping through any type of interaction. He does seem to want to focus in on our face and study certain baby type objects we place in front of him, but it is only for a few minutes (if that long) until he falls asleep again. As for growth...I don't know how much he weighs exactly. He was 8 lbs 9 oz at birth and 9 lbs 3 oz before his heart surgery on July 22nd. I highly doubt he is over 10 lbs right now. He can still wear his newborn outfits and easily wears 0-3 months. And he is still wearing newborn diapers as the size 1's are too big.

As for Emerson (let us not forget the other child), she is insane. More energy than I have ever dreamed of having. With all this energetic enthusiasm, we are all learning the value of "time out" this past week. I am not sure if that is the best form of 2 year old punishment. But she has been acting out...I don't know if it is the fact that she is 2 or we have been transferring her back and forth from us (home or in Birmingham) and between grandparents almost daily. Nothing has been the same for any of us for a long while.

As for the next week, we will be traveling back home! We have 2 more doctor's appointments before we make the drive. And then hopefully, using the weekend to become acclimated to our house again...I just hope our pool isn't green upon return.

One more picture before I go...Robert sleeping [shocker!] in the Moses basket. The blue bean bag came from his last hospital stay in the RNICU. These are made and donated by volunteers from Threads of Love. It gives the babies a sense of security like being held. The nurses will drape it across their chest or shoulder when fussy...It's quite effective actually. We have continued using it when we have to put him down to do things like eat...or blog. :)